The modern internet can be a major source of frustration and stress, especially if you, or someone close to you, has made a mistake.
A failure to take security seriously, or a willingness to trust in the kindness of anonymous strangers, might lead to sensitive data being shared, or even to personal safety being put at risk.
It’s easy to assign blame and demand that standards improve. But this can sometimes provoke a defensive reaction, especially if there’s an air of moral judgment attached to the criticism. So, how can we talk to family members about their online missteps? Let’s take a closer look.
Create a Safe, Judgment‑Free Space
The first thing to note is that if you punish family members too harshly, then they might be less inclined to admit to mistakes in the future. In some cases, this can be disastrous.
Try instead to create a calming, comfortable atmosphere in the home, where issues can be raised without fear of a shouting match. Make sure that you emphasize that mistakes are often a necessary first step to self-improvement, and that it’s better to talk about what’s gone wrong than to stumble into the same problem over and over.
Establish a Clear Family Conversation Plan
When a discussion feels unpredictable, people tend to remain silent. Try to adopt a few rules and frameworks to help steer the discussion in a productive direction. For example, you might insist that one person talk at a time, and to avoid shouting. It might also be a good idea to think about the physical layout. If two parents are sitting opposite a teenager, for example, it’s natural for the latter to feel outnumbered.
Address Online Safety Across All Age Groups
Internet users will face different kinds of online threats as they grow up. A teenage girl might be more vulnerable to social-media threats involving toxic attitudes and highly curated, or manipulated images. In every case, it’s worth setting limits on the total amount of screen time a child is allowed. You can do this through conversation – but make sure that you, as the parent, have the final word.
Technical solutions can present themselves, too. You might look at how to change IP address, for additional privacy.
Use Supportive Techniques to Guide Behavior Change
It’s vital that parents frame themselves as helpful, supportive actors, rather than confrontational, judgmental ones. Try to raise certain topics before they’ve had a chance to cause problems. Oversharing, cyberbullying, and phishing are all easier to deal with when children are pre-warned about them. When a problem does occur, it’s vital that you approach it with the required amount of empathy and consideration.
words Alexa Wang
